The Prep Talk (2): How to prioritize your wellness when doing a job search
In my work in higher education and student affairs, it is common to hear conversations about wellness that focus on the student populations that we serve on our campuses. Since the onset of the pandemic, it has become more common to hear this conversation focused on staff in student affairs as we continue to face the challenges of burnout, low staff morale or departure from the field. One area where I have not heard wellness discussed as readily is within the realm of the job search. The job search can be an overwhelming process. The uncertainty and vulnerability of it can take a toll on our overall wellness, our sense of self and can dim our passion for what we want to do if we do not employ the appropriate tools to address our wellness needs. In this post, I will focus on three things, how to better practice awareness of where you are, how to develop your self-care plan and how to build your community of care. For current graduate students in their first job search in the field, this post will provide a foundation and guideposts on how to develop and execute your personal wellness plan. For current professionals seeking their next position, my hope is that this post will be an invitation to reprioritize your wellness as you embark on another job search journey.
Where Am I?: Practicing Awareness
The job search is much more than the materials you submit and the interviews you have before getting a job. It is an experience that bleeds into all other aspects of your life in both positive and negative ways. The excitement of a call back for an interview or the expectation of an offer can bring new energy and drive to other parts of your life and relationships. Similarly, the stress and anxiety of not hearing anything from applications you’ve submitted or unmet expectations can lead you to withdraw from people and things that previously brought you joy and solace. Practicing awareness in your job search is an important tool for pinpointing and naming your emotions and wellness needs so that you can engage in self-care or connect with your community to talk through what you are experiencing. Here’s how you can incorporate this moving forward. The next time you go to work on a job search related task, pause and ask yourself these three questions:
Where am I right now?(physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually)
What am I feeling at this moment? (note of the emotions that come to mind).
Is there something I need to do to prioritize my wellness before I start this activity? (Let your response to the first two questions guide your response here. What’s in your personal wellness plan?)
When I do consultations, I often walk the person I am working with through one or more of these questions. It helps me to understand how they are entering the conversation or how they are processing the work we have already done. This in turn helps me to know where we may need to go from there. Taking time to honestly answer these questions can help you to settle your mind so you can be more focused on the task at hand. It can also make it clear that you need to stop and step away because you are not in the right place to continue.
“In the rising strong process, we can’t chart a brave new course until we recognize exactly where we are, get curious about how we got there, and decide where we want to go. Ours is an emotional reckoning” (p.46). Brené Brown, Rising Strong: How The Ability To Reset Transforms The Way We Live, Love, Parent, And Lead
Taking Care of Me: My Self-Care Plan
Your self-care plan should not be about distracting yourself from the difficult emotions. It should be about finding healthy ways to experience, process and redirect your emotional energy. When you make your self-care plan, focus on documenting the strategies that you are using currently or ones that have been successful in helping you to be grounded and re-centered. As you begin working on your plan, focus on three areas: Maintenance, Emergency and Fun.
Maintenance self-care is about the regular practices that you engage in that help you to be at your best. Some examples include your weekly or bi-weekly sessions with your counselor, weekly mindfulness activities, going for a walk or any other exercise that is part of your daily routine, reading a book, etc.
Emergency self-care focuses more on those moments where emotions may be higher or situations are more intensified than they are regularly. What do you need to do that will help you experience, process and redirect your emotional energy? These can include some of the things you have on your maintenance self-care list or contacting someone in your community of care (we will talk more about this in the next section). For example: going for a long drive, talking to a mentor, being in nature, etc.
Last, but not least, the Fun Stuff. Knowing when to step away from a job search task can at times be the most important self-care decision you make. You may just need something fun that will bring joy or peace to your life and re-energize you. What are those things for you? Remember the goal is not purely distraction. Think about the things that fill your cup rather than ways to just pass the time distractedly. Some examples include meeting up with friends to catch up, eating your favorite food, watching a show that you have wanted to see, reading a book, etc.
I Don’t Have to do This Alone: Identifying Your Community of Care
The job search can at times be an isolating experience, but you don't have to do it alone. Identify 3-7 people that you want to invite into your job search process. You get to decide how deeply you want to invite them in and how best they can support you. Be sure to talk with the people you have selected and let them know how you want them to be involved.
Natika Valerio, community organizer and researcher, defines community care as “People committed to leveraging their privilege to be there for one another in various ways.” (Dockray, 2019). Although most commonly used within the realm of activism, non-profit and community organizing, this concept also holds merit when considering the job search. Your community of care– the peers, mentors, family, friends, etc., who you are inviting along on this journey– can be the ones that offer support and encouragement in many ways as you go through your job search. From regularly checking-in on you to being your practice buddies and sounding boards as you prepare for or process an interview experience, this community can be integral in helping you remain motivated, and lifting you up when needed.
The job search can pose a particular challenge to graduate students in their first search. Being among a cohort of your peers can at times offer support. I have also often seen it drive feelings of anxiety, competition or insecurity. It is important that before you get into the thick of the job search, you make a decision about who you want to allow into the process with you and how you want them to support you. Setting these boundaries and communicating them early will help you to feel more in control of your experience in the job search.
Now What?
Open up your Search Better Workbook. If you have not already downloaded the free workbook, Search Better: A Reflective Road Map to Your Job Search, click the button below to get started.
Once you have the workbook, go to pages 13 and 14 and start developing and writing out your personal wellness plan. Include any thoughts you had as you read through this post.
You can also download the FREE Practicing Awareness Worksheet that you can use moving forward as you reflect on and engage in your job search process.
